I thought I knew the meaning of the 12 steps, and that I could just breeze right through them. What I found out was that I didn't know the meaning of the steps until after I had worked them.
I can't tell if I'm finished with a step because I can't see my own progress.
"If I could have figured out a way to keep on living and keep on drinking, I would have missed this whole program of Alcoholics Anonymous. And that would be too bad because AA has turned my biggest problem into my greatest asset."
"After six months sober, I picked up a bottle and took it home and drank about half of it. When my daughter came home and saw that I had been drinking again, she got mad and came after me. So I went after her, but I know I didn't hurt her as bad as it looked in the pictures."
"My wife was laying in bed next to me sobbing because I was drunk again. I wanted to turn to her and comfort her, to tell her that everything would be allright, but I couldn't, I knew that things wouldn't be allright, that I couldn't stop drinking."
"Everybody I know in AA has had truly incredible and amazing experiences in their lives while they were drinking but because we stopped growing emotionally when we drank, not one of us ever learned a damn thing from any of those experiences."
"When I stop working the program, then the rewind in my head starts up again."
"The newcomer reminds us that out there nothing has changed."
"The steps help to bring my head and my heart together
"I used to ask for advice, now I ask for help."
"When you come to A.A., if you don't believe in God, then make believe."
"I saw a man lay out his clothes for the next day, but those weren't the clothes that he was wearing when he met his fate after drinking."
"I would have kept on drinking but the price got too high."
"If the bottle wasn't empty, I wasn't through drinking."
"I wouldn't let someone else do to me, what I did to myself."
When I went to meeting and they told me:
"Sit down!", I could barely stand anyway.
"Shut up!", I could shut up 'cause I was all talked out, my fight was used up.
"Keep coming back!", Now that was good news that I hadn't heard in a long,long time!
"Keep coming back!"
June 1, 2005
Another beautiful day. Founders day is next weekend. Come on to Akron for fellowship.
May 5, 2005
Cinco de Mayo, just another beautiful day in America, not an excuse to get drunk. I said my prayers this morning. What I'm praying about these days is that I can just lose my ego and be a good worker. Life would be so much easier if I didn't always have to second guess everything and twist it to my own interpretation, if I could just do what needs to be done and go on about my business. O.K., so whats the underlying discontent here?? Dunno, I'll call my sponser and get back to you.